“He will be our peace” Micah 5:5

I am the kind of woman who loves to have control. I am very particular of the different situations I put myself in; I guard my heart (maybe a little too much), and I allow my introvert[ism] to be an excuse more than I probably should. I had my own safety bubble where I had complete control and honestly, I loved my little safety bubble. I was safe and I thought I was happy. While I thought that my bubble was helping me to avoid pain….the Lord knew that it was hindering me more than it was keeping me safe. So of course the Lord decided to room me with an extrovert, shake the ground I was standing on, and pressing me to be more intentional in relationships. 

Now, of course I tried to run in every other direction other than the one He had for me. I fought it. I was afraid. Afraid of being vulnerable with others, afraid to let go of control, and afraid of the unknown road ahead. Trust, like many other emotions, don’t necessarily come easy to me. I had been hurt so badly by people who I loved; people I trusted. It honestly seemed easier to not trust than to trust at all (crazy as that may sound, it made sense to me at that time in my life). 

I had a lot of acquaintances, continued to pencil in my agenda how I wanted my life to play out, and was an expert at keeping people at arms length. I was content- or at least I thought I was. The Lord knew that what I really needed was real relationships, that I needed to learn to be vulnerable with others, and to let go of the need to be in control. 

John 16:33 “these things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world”.

I was trying so hard to keep the world out, to keep my heart protected, and to keep my life “in order”. My life was a constant roller coaster. I was constantly going up and down; never knowing what loop or fall would lie ahead. When the Lord started to remind me of His peace, I realized that life doesn’t have to be such a crazy ride. Yes, we will have some ups and downs, but we don’t have to be afraid of the twists and turns. We don’t have to anticipate the feeling of failure- because through Christ we have VICTORY. We can live in absolute peace knowing that the Lord is holding us in His hands.

Life is meant to be lived full of love, joy, cheerfulness, and peace. 

I can be stubborn at times (most who know me, know this), but I was tired. Tired of being afraid, tired of trying to control EVERYTHING. I decided that it would not come naturally for me, so I chose  daily to surrender it all to the Lord. My worries, my relationships, my career path, my fears; my life. Through His grace, I have never felt more alive that I have over the past couple months. 

I was terrified of being intentional in my relationships, but I now have a community of other believers and finding a joy in it that I did not know existed. We hold each other accountable, pray for one another, and in the midst of how guarded I can be this is where I feel the most safe. A place where I  can be vulnerable and open with others.

I think we can often become comfortable where we are. 

We dream about being able to change, about making a difference, 

but we do nothing about it. 

We are too afraid. 

Well friends, I am here to encourage you. 

Step out of your bubble, out of your comfort zone. 

You can definitely make a difference. 

You can live your life FULL of peace, love, and cheerfulness. 

You don’t have to be afraid. 

Allow God to be your peace! 

One thought on “breathe.

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